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Donny Palmer (Wooly Mammoth)
The Idea Guy. Bad idea guy. Working a dead-end job as a Customer Service Manager in a call center, Donny is continually coming up with ill conceived ideas with disastrous results. Happily married to his wife Deb and dedicated to their two kids, Jake and MK, he spends most of his free time with his side-kick and best friend Chuck, implementing and executing yet another scheme. Doingo!
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Chuck Matson (Wooly Mammoth)
The Go Along Guy. Donny’s best friend since childhood, Chuck encourages and participates in every one of Donny’s "ideas." This easy going Mammoth works construction for the town of Ararat, is hopelessly single and happiest when he is hanging out with Donny, watching sports, drinking beer and being a part of the Palmer family.
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Mayor Whitt Nichols (Emperor Penguin)
The Career Politician. Mayor Nichols will do anything to stay in his position of power and spends his time abusing that power for self-profit. He tries to create the illusion things are turning around for the town of Ararat, while cutting corners, accepting bribes, and getting in bed with anyone who can help his personal bottom line. Running Ararat is a bank account for Whit. Krill Baby Krill!
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Assistant Mayor Scott Lamph (Rat)
The Social Sycophant. Scott Lamph works for the Mayor and is a career, self-serving politician in training. He supports Nichols in every shady deal, embezzling his share along the way. He accepts the role as Nichol’s whipping boy when things go wrong, and things always go wrong.
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Tiffany Minxx (Mink)
The Honest Civil Servant. Tiffany is the assistant to the Mayor and is a smart, professional, hard worker with political aspirations of her own. She is the only one that keeps what's left of Ararat running. She uses her sex appeal as a tool, making the simple male characters do what she wants.
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Superintendent Stan Ward (Beaver)
The Rumpled Academic. Principal Ward is an incompetent academic, with little to no practical knowledge or management skills. His incompetence in managing the day to day operations is painful and he has long winded, opinionated, philosophical solutions to simple issues.
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Deb Palmer (Wooly Mammoth)
The Prodigal Wife. Deb is the popular and witty wife of Donny, who runs the town beauty salon "Hairitics". She moved back and married Donny, after a few years as a beautician to the stars in the big city. Unlike most of the town, she has seen the world beyond Ararat. Happily married, Deb often feels like she has 4 children, Jake, MK and Chuck and Donny.
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MK and Jake Palmer (Wooly Mammoths)
MK is the Ararat Girl. She is at the female consumerism crossroads between "little girls and princesses" and being a slutty teenager. Everything is oversized for this mammoth girl, including the drama. Jake is a Merd (Mammoth Nerd). A nerdy, young boy, who MK is constantly trying to make "cool", through her consumerism lens.
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Brittany Smith (Wooly Mammoth)
The Townie with Dreams. Brittany is an Ararat lifer, with dreams to be much more. She longs to be Deb, worldly and smart, but her small town, low class roots keep showing through. She has constant plans to move out of Ararat, but it never seems to happen.
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Dick Harlow (Sloth)
The Soothsayer. Dick is a well read and highly intelligent sloth, with astute assessments of society, as well as accurate predictions of what is to come. His stories are so slow and long winded that no one ever makes to the end. He is a regular part of Chuck and Donny's crew at the New Eden.
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Atool Massari (Saber Tooth Tiger)
The Tycoon. Atool is a handsome Egyptian oil tycoon, and a millionaire, with a blue tooth permanently implanted in his ear. He is constantly wheeling and dealing, but tries hard to fit in with Chuck and Donny and their middle-class posse. His wealth and cultural discrepancies provide constant foot in mouth moments.
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Janine Massri (Saber Tooth Tiger)
The Trophy Wife. She married Atool for his money and does nothing but pamper herself, shop, and fantasize about Twilight characters. With a ton of plastic surgery, Janine looks like a Barbie doll with the intelligence of one as well.
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Jamie Hagel (DoDo Bird)
The Girl's Basketball Coach. Jamie is a t-shirt, mullet-wearing girl's basketball coach who also teaches at Ararat High School. Part of Chuck and Donny's posse, Jamie is one of the guys and the ringer in their softball and dart leagues. Chuck doesn't understand that she is not actually a guy. She is married to Terry, another Dodo and they look so much alike, people in town constantly confuse them.
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Terry Hagel (DoDo Bird)
The Handy "Man". Terry is a mirror image of her wife Jamie - a t-shirt, mullet-wearing Girl’s Basketball Coach. Terry has her own lumber and carpentry company Cyprus Wood Company and stands to benefit greatly as a subcontractor in the construction of Noah's cruise line.
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Mort Malone (Flamingo)
The Office Fun Guy. Mort is the post-college office fun guy who spends his work hours, cube visiting, organizing betting pools, parties and softball leagues. No one knows what Mort does but everyone loves having him around…except when work actually needs to get done.
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Sam Simmons (Starfish)
The Office Gossip. Sam is the bitchy office gossip who cannot keep a secret and is ruthless about his co-worker’s. Everyone enjoys swinging by Sam’s office, the water cooler, for some dirt but no one wants to be on the receiving end of Sam’s sharp tongue and loose lips.
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George Abdelsaye (Camel)
The Stereotype. Camel George runs the lobby store in Donny’s high-rise. A buddy of Donny’s, he sells him daily snacks, lunch and lottery tickets and constantly teases him for eating too much and that he is unlucky.
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Rose Solomon (Condor)
The Office Battle Ax. Rose, Donny’s cube mate, is the grumpiest and eldest worker in Donny’s office. Constantly moments from retirement, Rose has no time or patience for her co-workers and she can cut anyone down to size with her razor-like comments.
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Noah (Human)
The 1%. Noah is the epitome of the corporate CEO, who has only the corporation's best interests in mind, at all times. He has “chosen” Ararat as home base for the development of his billion dollar cruise line, Covenant Cruises, as the town will allow him to do anything.
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Japeth (Human)
The Ass Kiss. Japeth is the eldest son of Noah and in line to take over the family business. He is professional to a point of fault, humorless, and incredibly type A. He is an ass kissing, corporate ladder climber and is always a little too invested.
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The Board of Directors (Phone)
The silent partner. The Board is never seen and only heard over a speakerphone. They speak only to Noah and clearly exert a powerful influence over all business decisions at Covenant Cruise Lines. This is the Word of the Board.
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Shem (Human)
The Flamboyant Son. Shem is the middle son of Noah and works in the family business as the Covenant Cruise Director. He is fabulous on all regards – a great dresser, dancer and socializer. He uses his job to plan amazing fabulous parties, perfect for meeting the next Mr. Now.
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Ham (An Actual ham)
Mmmm, ham. Ham is the much younger son of Noah and an actual Ham, which is never addressed. Ham occasionally helps out Noah at work, but is primarily a high school student at Ararat high. A bit of a social outcast, Ham spends most of his time with his best friend Jake Palmer who constantly has to rescue him from being eaten by other kids.
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Officer O’Malley (Black Bear)
The Irish cop. Officer O’Malley is your typical Irish Catholic bigoted cop. He’s been on the force since graduating from high school and is partnered with his buddy Officer Ryder who he constantly offends with backhanded racial marsupial comments.
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Officer Ryder (Koala)
The "Token" Koala. Officer Ryder is one of the inept Ararat police force and is constantly battling against racial marsupial insensitivity. His lazy partner and good buddy Officer O’Malley unknowingly offends him daily as they sit on their beat, drinking beers and not fighting crime.
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Moses (Human)
The Codger. Moses runs the town popular dive bar, The New Eden. Foul mouthed and slow moving, Moses takes forever to fill a drink order and keeps the repaired Ten Commandments on the wall in an attempt to get patrons to stop stealing from him. His bar is the second home to Donny, Chuck and their posse of pals.
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Betty Harlow (Sloth)
Late. Betty is the wife of Dick and the essence of a 1950s wife and mother. Her style and fashion is outdated and she’s just as boring, corny and straight-laced. Incredibly slow moving, Betty and Dick have missed every town event because they just didn’t leave enough time.
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